The 5 Steps to Choosing the Right Divorce Lawyer

THE 5 STEPS TO CHOOSING THE RIGHT DIVORCE LAWYER

This blog is brought to you courtesy of www.lawyerselect.ca

Let’s face it. You’re not exactly sure where to start or what to do when you’re facing a potential divorce action. The fact is most of us don’t have any prior experience with the ins and outs of the legal process of divorce. I can’t tell you how many stories I’ve heard from previous clients about the time and money they wasted on divorce lawyers before we were able to connect them with the right one. Finding the right divorce lawyer right from the get-go is one of the keys to ensuring that your divorce is faster, cheaper, and less complicated. Sadly, however, if you don’t know what to look for, or the questions to ask, you’re likely to repeat the mistakes of those before you. So here it is: the five steps to helping you find the divorce lawyer that’s right for you.

Step #1 – Try And Be Realistic

First and foremost, you need to come to grips with the fact that divorce is a legal process, the sole purpose of which is to dissolve all your assets and resolve any outstanding custody issues. Your lawyer’s job is to represent you in this process. It’s not their job to listen to how horrible of a husband or wife your partner is, or to act as your therapist or psychologist. And why would you want them to? They’re not trained to do that, and it’ll also cost you a lot of money. Save that part of your divorce for the pros that are trained in that field, not your divorce lawyer. Secondly, divorce lawyers have likely seen and heard it all. That means it’ll be quite difficult to surprise them. So what seems like a very important issue to you might actually be a relatively unimportant issue in the legal process. Let your divorce lawyer be the judge of that. Don’t insist on them making a bigger issue out of something that will pay little dividends.

Step #2 – Keep Focused On The Goal At Hand

Ask yourself: what is the main goal that I want to achieve here? Well, if it’s anything like our previous clients, the main goal is to get a divorce without having a major change in your lifestyle. With that in mind, you should be cautious not to let your emotions run wild when it comes time for the negotiations over the material things that won’t mean a whole lot to you in the bigger picture. If you do, it’ll almost always mean that your divorce process will be longer, more expensive, and more emotionally draining. So stay focused on the goal at hand.

Step #3 – Figure Out What You Want And Stick To It

Before you jump the gun and hire a divorce lawyer, make sure that you’ve considered all the available alternatives to traditional divorce litigation. So, for example, if you’re not entangled with issues of child custody and financial matters, you could benefit more from a mediator who can help you negotiate the terms of your divorce, which you can then have ratified by a judge in the form of an order. The benefits of divorce meditation are that it’s faster, cheaper and less emotionally taxing than traditional divorce litigation. However, if negotiations become complicated and riddled with legal issues, then you’re best bet is to involve a lawyer who can take over the negotiations and see them through. Another alternative that’s gaining in popularity is collaborative family law, which is primarily focused on negotiation with the goal of preserving a co-parenting relationship. This is an excellent alternative if you’re still on speaking terms with your spouse, and you wish to maintain a cordial relationship for the benefit of your children. Your final option is a traditional litigated divorce proceeding. Typically, these are the cases where neither side is willing to compromise enough to make either negotiation, or collaborative family law an option. So deciding what kind of divorce lawyer you’ll need will have a lot to do with what route you think you case can fit into.

Step #4 – Keep An Eye Out For Red Flags

Sadly, and all too often, divorce lawyers will just tell you exactly what you want to hear. Their main goal is to close the deal and get paid. Always be aware that there are no guarantees in this process, so if a lawyer starts making promises respecting them outcome, don’t believe them and walk away. They’re likely to have a skewed moral compass, and you’re better off without them. Another common red flag is where lawyers begin name-dropping. If they start talking about their high-profile clients, or they disclose confidential information from previous cases they had, there’s a very good chance that they’re making it all up, and/or they’ll do the same to you to sucker another client into retaining them. Another common red flag is when they undermine or disrespect other divorce lawyers, especially those that you’ve interviewed with and are considering retaining. If they’re disrespectful of their fellow colleagues, there’s a good chance they’ll disrespect you at some point down the line. And if they seem to be constantly distracted by their phone, or emails, or other more important clients during your time with them, take that as another clear red flag. Their sole attention should be on you. And lastly, make sure that whoever you hire plans on playing by the rules. If they’re suggesting that you employ an ethically questionable strategy to get the best results from your divorce, you should take that advice with a great deal of caution and scepticism. After all, you’re the one with everything to lose here, not them.

Step #5 – How To Make Your Decision

The divorce lawyer that you choose to represent you should (1) be local, (2) be professional, (3) be knowledgeable on the issues specific to your case, (4) be responsive, and (5) be a good communicator. Think about it: this lawyer is someone you’re going to have to trust and feel totally comfortable disclosing intimate details to. They’ll also have to be someone who supports your basic philosophy towards the divorce process, and who has a style that works well with your specific personality. They’ll have to be someone who recognizes the importance your children play in your life, and who puts their interests first above financial gain or spite. They should be someone who won’t champion unreasonable demands, and who plays fair.

As a final thought, keep in mind that divorce is a highly personal and emotional process, the outcome of which can, and likely will, have a significant impact on your life. This is an important decision, and you should always be aware that there are no guarantees in this process. However, if you follow the steps that we’ve outline here, we’re confident that you’ll find the right divorce lawyer for your matter – that is, someone who listens to what you want, and advises you well and always has your best interests in mind and at heart.